I recently read an article by Seth Godin called:
Turning the habit of self-criticism upside down
It was a very interesting article when he shared his thoughts on dealing with setbacks:
“When it’s time to write a resume or talk to a boss or discuss a project glitch with colleagues, the instinct is to spin, to avoid a little responsibility, to sit quietly. Put a best face forward, don’t set yourself up.
When reviewing just about anything you’ve done with yourself (in your head), the instinct is to be brutal, relentlessly critical and filled with doubt and self-blame.
What if they were reversed?
What if the habit of the project review meeting was for each person to put their worst foot forward, to identify every item that they learned from? What if we took responsibility as a way of getting more authority next time?
And the flip side–when talking to ourselves, what if we were a little more supportive?”
It got me thinking; what if it is was reversed?
What would happen if you told your bosses, I did this wrong and I need help to improve, I want your feedback? What would happen if you started telling yourself, I learned, I did well, let’s get back on the horse and try again?
Be your own cheerleader
I think this thought is very important. If you keep motivating yourself to try again, to try harder, never give up and take every possible opportunity to learn by asking your peers, bosses and employees we would quickly become widely successful.
The Chinese Proverb comes to mind:
“One who asks questions is a fool for 5 minutes, one who does not ask questions remains a fool forever.”
How to change your inner dialogue
The most efficient method I have found to change your inner dialogue is to start saying more and more positive things to yourself until it becomes a habit.
Start saying things like “I like myself” “I am great” “I do this well” “I can do it!”
And soon it will become habit so that every time you have a setback you will reply with, that is okay, let’s do it again, time to learn, time to improve, I can do it!
By changing the way you talk to yourself you can change your life
A negative inner dialogue is one of the most common causes of stress and depression. By changing that dialogue you can break many negative cycles which will free up a lot of positive energy for yourself.
1. Start Using Self-Affirmations
Tell yourself every morning “I like myself” “I am great” “I do this well” “I can do it!”.
If you don’t believe me that this works, try it out for 30 days.
2. Stop laying blame
Start taking responsibility for your mistakes and make sure to learn.
All the energy you spend today trying to cover up your mistakes can be used in a much better way; it can be used to make positive change.
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